Setbacks and Stand Ups

Let Tides Rise AND Fall in Your Life

Amy Barr with The Lukeion Project

I rarely get the chance to visit the beach. When I do, I love to watch the tide come in and eventually go back out. As the tides change so do the residents. Birds appear when tide pools strand little fish for an easy meal. Buried under the sand unseen are little clams that make their presence known only when the tide hits a certain area. Joggers and dog walkers appear at low tide when the sand is firm and cool while seagulls enjoy extra treats turned over by high tides.

As an avid gardener who hopes to tweak my skills, I’ve recently added a few tips from phenology to structure my garden plans. Phenology is the scientific study of periodic biological phenomena, such as flowering, breeding, and migration, in relation to climatic conditions. This means that I know it is time to plant my potatoes when the daffodils begin to bloom. When my lilacs bloom, I’ll plant my beans. Sure, if the weather tells me there’s a snowstorm on its way, I’ll change my plans, but it is important to observe natural ebb and flow in nature.

Do birds sometimes get it wrong when they migrate? Do bears sometimes confuse when is the right or wrong time to crawl out of hibernation? Probably they do. But they obey the signals and do pretty well most of the time.

Humans also have tides. We too have ebb and flow, setbacks and stand ups.

Our modern lives are filled with electronics to keep track of our time and make us get up even if we are very tired. Lights are available to turn on even when it grows dark outside too early. Work and education schedules push us relentlessly even when we feel sick, sad, or even too energetic to focus well. Our few holidays are so hectic with activities and travel that we need rest afterwards but push back to our regular schedules as quickly as possible.

Humans have grown to ignore cyclical signals. As recently as a few decades ago our lives depended on them. Heading out into a blizzard was dangerous on foot or horseback. Ignoring summer heat could be deadly when obtaining water also required great effort. You couldn’t “do school” all year when your family depend on you to help with harvests and food storage. Vacations were just natural breaks between one seasonal demand and the next.

Some consider our liberation from cyclical demands to be a big gift. Dropping everything to harvest the hay was usually no fun. Fresh produce was limited to local seasons, so food choices were once limited. Who doesn’t like a safe warm car when we travel in the dead of winter? Just because we CAN ignore seasonal cycles, should we ignore natural ebbs and flows? No.

Humans can’t go-go-go full time. Likewise, we shouldn’t feel offended by difficulty or hard work. More importantly, we shouldn’t expect to be at the top of our game all the time. Setbacks are normal, natural, expected, and ceaseless. Our artificially lit, heated, and air-conditioned lives have ill prepared us for life’s tides. There will be good days. There will be truly dreadful ones. Some weeks will be filled with fresh strawberries while others will be nothing but beans and cabbage (or whatever you like / dislike).  

Give yourself grace during setbacks. All is not lost on those bad days! Visualize courage and success for yourself when things go badly. Soon the tides will turn (they always do), the season will change (it always does), the weather will improve (just wait for it), and it will be time for you to stand up once again.